Marriage Upkeep

Emory Report 1981-1987

Unfortunately, I did not find much while doing research in the MARBL on my topic so, I will write about what I did find interesting from an Emory Report dating from 1981-1987. There was a specific article that caught my eye pertaining to marriage. The article “Marriage upkeep” compared marriage to owning a home.

                        “If you by the best house in the world,

                         the day you move into it, it begins to fall

                         down. You have to polish the floors, paint

                         change the washer in the sink, clean the

                         toilet, make the beds and vacuum underneath

                         the sofa-all on a regular basis-or else your 

                         house fall down around your ears.”

This analogy, I think, describes marriage well. The issue that this article zoned in on is an issue that I think couples today continue to struggle with and that’s time-time to work, fuel and feed the relationship so that the love does not die. Even in the 1980’s, couples were burdened with a busy schedule and a set time period for family, interaction, and sexual time. This article advised the Emory students and faculty to not let schedules get in the way of what’s more important aspect of marriage-a relationship.

The article continues to go on even further about making accusations. For a participant of a relationship to not complain about “Why is it that we are having hamburgers again?” or “You never hang the towels up after you take a shower.” Instead of expressing oneself with “you always, you never or you don’t” one should begin with “I feel” or “I need.” this form of expressing and explaining will cause less drama and complications and everyone is happier because then there is no miscommunication.

Overall, I think that this article applies even today and how our lives have not slowed down over the years. This article reiterates the importance of a relationship in marriage and to continue working and improving it as if it were a house. I think that this article further implies how “sexy time” is of high importance and essential to any relationship. What I don’t necessarily agree with this article is how they connect sexy time exclusively to those in a legal, binding marriage. Why could they include those couple in a dating relationship? Further more, if sex is only for marriage then what about individuals in gay or lesbian relationships? Yes, I understand that for this time period “gay” or “lesbian” were unspoken terms but lets not forget that these individuals too participate in sexy time and they too develop deep relationships. Even today, these individuals still don’t get the recognition they deserve however, small steps have been taken to recognize these partnerships and we can only hope that someday soon they will be.

1 thought on “Marriage Upkeep

  1. Tazam: on the copy of the picture you have can you tell who wrote this? And who was it directed to? I am left wondering what motivated it’s publication? Was it just a general “work/life balance” article or was it in response to a report that came out about marriages “failing”? I am also struck by the exclusivity of the term “marriage.” I wonder if a writer could get away with such a term today.

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