By Ben Dell
Author of this month’s blog post
Before joining the myLIFE program at Emory Autism Center as a clinical counseling intern, the majority of my learning about autism had come from class lectures and textbooks. We were taught that autism is a spectrum and that it presents differently in each person, but still relied on the DSM-5 and similar texts to conceptualize what autism is supposed to look like in individuals. My past year at myLIFE have shown me that if one truly wants to learn about autism and autistic people, and how to best support them, the best way is to learn personally from autistic people by being willing to listen deeply and to think creatively.
For example: I have come to realize that I tend to speak abstractly, and this style is not always the most accessible way of speaking. I have learned that if I want to connect and communicate with some autistic folks, I need to be intentional about using directive communication. Still, this is not true for everyone with an autism diagnosis. Therefore, I must take the time to first get to know each person and discover what way of communicating helps them to access the thoughts I am sharing and participate in a meaningful conversation.
A common misconception about autism, couched in the lingo of the DSM-V, is to assume that so-called “restricted interests” are inherently maladaptive. I have learned that there are times where special interests can get in the way of other things that need doing, but also that they shed light on an individual’s values and, when these interests are shared, allow for a way to enter the world of an autistic person on their terms. I am a big Star Wars nerd (well, maybe just a big nerd in general) and when I am working with someone who also likes Star Wars, it not only provides us with a shared interest, but also a common language which can be employed in our work together. For instance, I have used Star Wars concepts and characters to provide psychoeducation or introduce a new coping skill. This not only can make counseling more fun for both of us, but also makes use of the individual’s existing frame of reference, and hopefully, makes the information more digestible and accessible.
Similarly, I have also learned from myLIFE members that stimming serves a purpose and that everyone, autistic or allistic, makes use of stimming at some point. Some of the most prominent functions of stimming are to distract, to self-sooth, or to entertain ourselves. Some stims can become disruptive or distracting depending on the setting, but not all settings and not all the time. I am a chronic “leg-bouncer,” especially when I am working at a computer. My leg bouncing can be really disruptive if I am sitting at the dinner table and causing the entire table to vibrate. However, it is not disruptive sitting alone at my desk as I am now.
I am grateful to have known, loved, and worked with many autistic people in my life, and I am especially grateful for the learning that has taken place as an intern in the myLIFE program at Emory Autism Center. I hope that other professionals who seek to support the autism community take the time to listen to and learn from autistic folks and use what they learn to inform the way they provide care.