Fifteen minutes before add/drop/swap ended, I picked back up a Physics class that I dropped six hours earlier. For these six hours, I had felt peace that I was no longer limited by anymore pre-med pre-requisites or MCAT courses or 6 years of medical training to begin my mission in the world.

Fifteen minutes before add/drop/swap ended, I received an e-mail from a company founded by a scientist. I quickly began to doubt my decision and thought if I wanted to work in both medicine and service, I could. Though while studying for Physics, I again felt the need to be doing something else. I know I could be doing something else that is more beneficial for people right now. But how do I start and where do I start?

More questions and thoughts, pros and cons pass through my head for the following few days.

Today, as I read our assigned articles, I realize that medicine can in fact be beneficial for very many people. Though the lack of access to medicine is the problem.

While I hate that modern medicine treats symptoms, not causes of diseases. By serving as a medical doctor in underserved areas, I would be likewise treating the symptoms of corrupt governance and lack of healthcare accessibility instead of finding ways to make changes at the root causes of these problems.

I still don’t know where my place in the equation is meant to be.

But I know that the spark these courses, articles, and information intrigue within must not be ignored.