Hitting the Pandemic Wall

By Farah Dharamshi, MSEd., JM

Hitting the wall…

I get it. It has been a year since the WHO declared COVID-19 a pandemic. A year since your classes went online. A year since your classroom or office became your bedroom, kitchen, closet. A year since you left the house without your mask and hand sanitizer.

What a year it’s been.

You haven’t “seen” or hugged your parents, you lost your uncle, your neighbor’s wife passed away, your friends have been reduced to squares of pixels on your display.

So you’ve turned to something, to do- anything to fill the creeping expanse of a seemingly endless year (decade? Who even knows anymore?).

You have attempted bread baking and quilting, you have tried to compete in virtual races, you have watched every Netflix, HBO Max, Amazon series/movie (and found out that some things just should not be made), started reading five books each month (but never actually finished one), reorganized every drawer in your home while writing hundreds of Vote Now postcards, and rallying against social injustice, and now…

You are done.

You are depleted.

You have APEs to secure, midterms to study for, jobs to apply to, a thesis to complete, grants to write and you are too exhausted to move. Perhaps you are also struggling with feeling bad for – feeling bad. Rationally, you’re upset with yourself. You are scientists. You know the value of social distancing, and the importance of all the mitigation procedures in place.

But knowing why we need to remain as Zoom-connected islands doesn’t make it any easier. So many of us feel immobilized and stuck in a never-ending downward spiral.

When I have found myself struggling this past year, I have delved into the science of motivation. According to Brad Stulberg, a performance coach, there are two types of fatigue. The first in which your body and mind are genuinely exhausted (“real fatigue”), and the second in where your body has tricked yourself into feeling drained because you have been in the same old routine for the past twelve months (“fake fatigue”).

Dealing with this fatigue requires two diametrically opposed responses: stopping or moving.

The first type is easy to spot – your body is achy and sore, your mind feels psychologically fried. You need to stop, rest, prioritize sleep hygiene, and disconnect (spending time in nature always helps). While the second type is easier to discern physically, it feels the same mentally; the psychological inertia: sluggishness, apathy. The longer you wait for the drive and motivation that got you to Rollins to appear, the more weighted down you feel. A core tenet of behavioral activation  is that mood follows action. According to Brad Stulberg, “you don’t need to feel good to get going, you need to get going to give yourself a chance to feel good.”

Clinical psychologist, Thea Gallagher offers some helpful suggestions to push through the wall:

• Give yourself credit for all that you are doing and write it down at the end of the day.
• Find joy in the little things where you can.
• Get outside for some mood-boosting fresh air.
• Don’t beat yourself up. Treat yourself with the compassion that you would treat someone you love.
• Engage with what you can control (regular meals, sleep hygiene, exercise).
• Don’t be afraid to reach out for help. Your mental health is as important as your physical health.

For me, the daily practice of running served as the one thing I was able to maintain control over. When the world stopped, I could still put on my shoes every morning and go somewhere (even if they were endless loops around the school track). While I cringed almost every time the alarm rang, I knew it was the only semblance of my life pre-COVID that I could retain. That agency has powered me through.

We are in the home stretch. There is a visible light just around the corner. Plants are budding and spring is in the air. The time change “forward” is more meaningful this year than ever before. I know it’s hard, but after a brief respite get up again. The world needs you.

You’ve got this.

Farah Dharamshi, MSEd., JM,  is an Associate Director of Academic Programs (ADAP) in the Department of Epidemiology at the Rollins School of Public Health.

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References 

1. https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-guide/behavioral-activation-guide
2. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/on-the-other-side-of-that-pandemic-wall/
3. https://www-scientificamerican-com.proxy.library.emory.edu/article/how-we-can-deal-with-pandemic-fatigue/